"Culture and Tradition" vs. "Modernism"

I have been debating with others as well with myself, about the question of culture and tradition (well that IS what, we Indians always bring in between EVERY discussion) conflicting with modernism. The major point of concern here is what we mean by culture AND tradition and also what we consider Modernism today as.

There was a time when modernism meant development, bringing changes, accepting new ideas and ideologies, creating a more comfortable world, and the most important aspect lay in changing the mind-set! India, though, developed a LOT in all these catagories, but has failed to change the age old mind set patriarchy! Not only this many families till today don't educate the female child. Putting the gender-education difference aside there is the topic of "culture and tradition". My question is that: Why does culture and gender hinder only with women coming into outer world? Why is there never a finger pointed at 'men'? Why all the "cultural and trational" rules for only WOMEN?Why not for MEN?
Consider the recent Mangalore incidence. Why is it that if MEN drink everything is fine, and if a a woman even touches a vodka she is accused of violating our Indian culture?Not that 'm in favour of drinking, but it IS a major concern. Is'nt it? Well this is fact, like it or not. India is a country where infrastuctural and industrial development is hapening rapidly but there is hardly any growth in the deep rooted psychology.
There are other examples:If a man hits and abuses PLUS physically abuses his wife (for ABSOLUTLY no reason) that shows his musculinity....??!?(big question) AND if ever there is a case of a wife beating up her husband its considered as violating the culture...as a wife CANNOT make her husband realise that a husband could be at fault, after all THE husband is the 'sant parmeshwar',right?
A girl child is taught from her childhood that she has to leave her father's home- get married- worship her husband- and what all not! As if there no better knowledge available. Her educaton is made limited, her ideas are resticted, her voice is suppressed! THAT is what culture is meant TODAY! The 'today' which considered as the "Kalyug'!
The meaning of "culture and tradition" has been completly trasformed. Modernism has been altered. The true meaning has been lost. Culture and tradition, which was once considered a cherished idea in India has now become a problem which is growing with every generation.

From the above essay don't judge me as a feminist. Naah, m not a feminist. There are problems that men face but as far as I know in this context there is hardly any amn who face a problem. All men cherish their position, which the partiarchy has given them. It's majorly women who are blamed with "culture and tradition" rule breaking.If there ARE incidences in which men have ever faced such a problem, lease do let me know. No one will be happier that me.Oh! now don't consider me a sadist!