Strike off

I found this pretty interesting in a blog "Blossoms" , I went through recently, It's pretty interesting tag and simple. Just strike off the things that you haven't done in your life yet. Here I go :)

1. Smoked a Cigarette.
2. Got so drunk you passed out.
3. Rode every ride at an amusement park.
4. Collected something stupid.( Bus tickets!)
5. Gone to a Rock Concert. (East India Company, Kailash kher.)
6. Helped someone.(I try not to, but I do)
7. Gone fishing.
8. Watched four movies in one night. (Many times.)
9. Lied to someone.
10. Snorted cocaine.
11. Smoked weed.
12. Failed a subject. 
13. Been in a car accident.(Not car, but scooty yes. ALL THE TIME. )
14. Been in a tornado.
15. Watched someone die.
16. Been to a funeral.
17. Burned Yourself.(Not deliberately, accidentally...many times. )
18. Run a marathon.
19. Cried yourself to sleep.(Infinite nights)
20. Flown in an aeroplane.
21. Cheated on someone.
22. Been cheated on.
23. Written a 10 page letter.
24. Gone skiing.
25. Been sailing.
26. Cut yourself.(Again accidentally , often)
27. Had a best friend.(THREE)
28. Lost someone you loved.
29. Got into trouble for something you didn’t do.
30. Stolen a book from the library. 
31. Gone to a different country.
32. Watched the Harry Potter movies. 
33. Had an online diary.(Yeah! )
34. Fired a gun. ( All the time. It's fun. )
35. Gambled in a casino. 
36. Been in a school play.
37. Been fired from a job.
38. Taken a lie detector test.
39. Swam with dolphins.
40. Voted for someone on a reality TV show. 
41. Written poetry. 
42. Read more than 20 books a year. (More than that.)
43. Gone to Europe.
44. Used a colouring book over age 12. ( Oh, I love that.)
45. Had a Surgery.
46. Had stitches.
47. Taken a Taxi.
48. Had more than 5 IM conversations going on at once. ( I'm a girl afterall ;) )
49. Been in a fist fight. ( Yeah with my sister. Oh, I miss it. )
50. Suffered any form of abuse.( Verbal)
51. Had a pet.
52. Petted a wild animal.
53. Had your own credit card & bought something with it.
54. Dyed your hair.
55. Got a tattoo.
56. Had something pierced. (Four ear piercings.)
57. Known someone personally with HIV or AIDS.
58. Taken pictures with a web cam.
59. Lost something expensive.
60. Gone to sleep with music on. 
    
    Whoever wants to take it up, please do. Have fun. Cheers! 

Sometimes

There are times when I want

Nay, I need 

to be alone, and just hide and cry.

And yet wishing

Someone would see my tears

And try to just

dry 'em

making them precious jems.

....And the tears come faster.

Suddenly all those memories

Lovely memories rush though my mind.

Knowingly yet unknowingly

that angel up there is sad,

because I am...

So I make my night wish

Not to God,

But to my angel.

"Take me, when my time comes,

...and may my time come...

Before my loved one's."

Every time
We are reminded
of where we are headed
despite the fact, that we can't help it.

Seasons change outside
Never to be the same,
Or to come back...
Like a tide.
So alone,
Just trying to store
Some of the memories
Of my happy diary.

So alone,
I wait.
For there is nothing to be done.
Waiting for the next disaster to strike,
Or the next memory I can strore,
Or....keep trying to forget
That I'm alone.
Right here.
Waiting,
For the painting
Full of colors
That fate might have been planing
To paint
But instead,
Sucked all the colors by a straw
leaving it, as a 'pending file'.

Oh despair! Go away!
Give joy some way.
Make life what it is meant to be.
And then. maybe,
My 'file' will be brought down that dusty shack,
and given the spark,
the splash of rainbow
filling in the cracks.

Oh yes.
I'll be happy again.



But when?

For we are never 'alone'

An evening with orange sun,
Pink ringlets in the blue-white horizon,
A bird chirping happily,
That! there is a reason to live.

A smile on a stranger's face,
Leaving a smile on my face,
Like a trace,
That! there is a reason to live.

A kid waving across the street,
Brightens the moment like
candles in darkness,
That! there is a reason to live.

A long drive
without destination.
Running out of gas,
A favorite song playing on the radio,
Buying random things on random stops,
Looking at fellow travelers,
A passing wave
On the highway
A cute guy looking for lift
That is life in a jist.
For we are never alone.
For in being alone also, there are others who are alone.
This is,
A reason to live.

An apology to self, and others

Its been three months or so since my last post, and I feel so guilty. I read one of my friend's blog today and I was so inspired to get back here and write something, just to satisfy my inner guilt. This place has been a real *escape* for me, I have not written anything these past few months because I really wasn't thinking about anything, good-bad. And it is not so because I've been super busy, it's been so because I've been ignoring everything. Yes its true.

And I confess this is not a very good reason. But really that has been the reason. The one thing that I've especially been avoiding is something this estranged person said to me. Something about me being fake, and unworthy of being me. And believe me, as much as your best friends try and convince you that you are not what they think we are not, the more curious we get. At least so has been the case with me.

Yes I have too much of ego, I don't have the ability to forgive, but I do forget...
And I should have forgotten this thing long back, but it has had a sad impact on me. There are many things I can't do, one of these many are I can't pretend. And I have been pretending. That's eating my insides! Gulping all the prospective happy moments. Because I know I have been pretending. I don't know why I keep doing it. I know it's so not me. Once started, I have continued it. And I want to end it. I have not said this to anyone. And no better place than here.

To this *estranged person*: Nothing gave you the right to say what you said to me. Not even the right to speech, because that right also has its ethical codes. Plus I have no idea what made you think the way you thought of me. I thought we'd be great friends and I hate it when people prove me wrong, but I accept it if its acceptable, but  can prove you wrong. So all I want to say is, 'm sorry we had to part ways because it has effected something that could have been avoided.

To the *un-knowingly suffering one* : I have been pretending  like nothing was wrong, but there *was* something wrong. I use was because with this piece of writing I am confessing and apologizing. I hope we never come back to this issue.

 

I Realized It Not Today

Not today,
Not yesterday,
I've been alone everyday.

And I realized it not today.

Last friends,
Down the river bends.
Made friends,
None making it to the end.

And I realized it not today.

The Jungle Girl

Ten million fire flies
Two million green lush trees
Three million fishes in the river near by
Four million autumn leaves

My Jungle.

Love, a lot of it.
Envy, not a bit.
Friends, lots of them.
Enemies, can't tolerate them.

My Jungle.

'M the Protectress.
'M the Queen.
'M the Keeper.
'M the Owner.
'M the laborer.

My Jungle.
I live in it;
and no one dare lay a finger on my sanctuary.

If I were

If I were a tree, I'd be Peepal.
If I were a plant, I'd be Cactus.
If I were a flower, I'd be Sunflower.
If I were a fruit, I'd be Strawberry.
If I were a vegetable, I'd be Bitter-Gaurd.

If I were a water body, I'd be Indian ocean
If I were a country, I'd be Mexico.
If I were a celestial body, I'd be Sun.
If I were an emotion, I'd be Passion.
I'f I were a religion, I'd be non.

If I were a drink, I'd be Vodka.
If I were a cake, I'd be chocolate with strawberry layering.
If I were a dish, I'd be Dum-Aloo
If I were a dessert, I'd be Daal ka halwa.

If I were a scent, I'd be rain-mud.
If I were a color, I'd be all of them.
If I were a dress, I'd be Saree.
If i were a shoe, I'd be flip-floppers.
If I were accessory, Id be ear-rings.

If I were a body part, I'd be eyes.
If I were a letter, I'd be 'M'.
If I were a book, I'd be 'Palace of Illusions'.
If I were a movie, I'd be Kabhi khushi kabhi ghum.
If I were a T.V. serial, I'd be F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

If I were a gizmo, I'd be a cell phone.
If I were an music instrument, I'd be Sitar.
If I were a song, I'd be 'Way back into love'.
If I were a furniture, I'd be luxurious Couch.
If I were an Ice-cream, I'd be all of them.
If I were a stone, I be ruby.
If I were an element, I'd be Platinum.

If I were a day, I'd be Wednesday.
If I were a year, I'd be 1990.
If I were a month, I'd be July.
If I were a time of the day, I'd be 24:00
If I were a season, Id be monsoon.
If I were a number, I'd be '8'.

If I were a bird, I'd be Phoenix.
If I were a insect, I'd be a fire fly.
If I were a Disney princess, I'd be Jasmine.
If I were an animal, I'd be a Lioness.
If I were a stationary, I'd be a page.
If I were a letter, I'd be 'M'.

The Everlasting Burning Flame

Karan

(Mahabharata Take #1)

O. Father

It was my luck to be your son.

But

There is a Burning fire

Inside my Heart;

Is it curiosity?

Is it doubt?  

O, the great ‘Guru’

What was my fault?

The Truth was hidden.

But

You are the Mighty;

I do not complain.

O, the great ‘Sage’

Un-aware of my Identity.

 But

True to my Virtue.

So what was MY fault?

For which I paid with my Life!

O, Dearest Friend

You gave me, what I craved for most;

You gave me the status;

You gave me the hand, to hold on to.

And all I had for you

Was

Unquestionable love and support at all times.

O, the great beauty

That walks on earth

But

Hushes me, as something below earth.

O, Mother

Why?

That’s all I can say,

Ask.

And so the everlasting flame diminishes

In the name of his true father, ‘Surya’

But

Still burns in every heart

Who

Reads the great epic;

Epic of all epics – ‘Mahabharata’.

So goes my story.

And, who am I?

I am

Eldest son of Kunti,

Un-Known brother of the Pandavas,

Un-Recognized love of Panchali,

Un-Flinching friend of Duryodhan,

So called un-worthy ‘shishya’ of Parshuram,

Un-Taught by Dronacharya,

Loved and brought up by the ‘Charioteer’.

I am Karan,

Surya putra.

[P.S. : To understand it better, read Karan’s story in ‘ MAHABHARATA.]

The Female Gaze

DISCLAIMER: This has been written on popular demand by my peers. Do not perceive me as a 'ho or 'tharkan'!  

You stand across the floor, a glass half full - half empty. Oh boy! The Reebok shoes, totally to drool over, and the blue semi – body hugging jeans…*drool*…oh, oh, oh…and the totally to die for aqua blue shirt…**I could eat you, if served on a platter** - those hands!! aa imagine them holding my face…those seemingly strong arms!! Oh baby, just pull me to you! How well this shirt defines your torso: oh imagine my hands running all over you! Ah that lop sided grin dancing on your face, so well defines it. And those side glances…oh sweet lord…! This wretched distance!

Oh poor heart! He turns…looks around, and those deeply beautiful eyes come and rest on me, that gaze is tearing me apart, taking me away, away to an ancient land…oh dear lord, pardon me for my cardinal sin…and he stares…my legs weaken. I’ll shatter into pieces if he keeps looking at me like that, and baby you could put me together with those delicate-beautiful and delicious-toxicating hands. And you come to a Holt, right in front of me! Oh, the lioness in me is ready to pounce and grab you by those sinfully-smooth-black hair of yours and kiss you right across those tempting lips…and your lips move, how wonderful would it be to lick them – oh! The delight of the thought, you are saying something but I can’t hear you, ‘m in my own fantastic world by the time I realize I’m nodding in approval of my lucrative and luring world of ‘sweet love’. And then, OH! The touch…I stare (He asks if she’d like to have a drink, while she is building her own castles of love-lust, she nods in approval of her imagination; which he takes as a yes to his question…and takes her by hand.)- and I jerk away. The thunderbolt is dropped on me , I stare, you are saying something again. I feel the sensation of your touch…I feel stupefied. I find myself saying, ‘I want a drink’, I walk in a trance…my poor-wretched heart jumping with delight. I was for water, it does not *normalize* my heartbeat, I ask for tequila…h the burning sensation, one more…I turn, one more…my eyes search for the only ecstasy of my life, ah the sight! One more, and I get up…I glide, I stand right behind him, smelling his delicious- refreshing fragrance, raising a finger I tap on his hard-well formed shoulder , he turns. Oh sweet lord! The lop sided grin. HOLD HIM BY HIS EARS, every molecule of my body is screaming…rip me to shreds. And I grab him. Oh, the maddening sensation. Every touch surprises me. Somewhere…far away…a song started…

            **Take me away, take me away

                 to a secret place…**

A kind of serenity befalls me, you toxicate me, oh baby – oh baby! And before I know what exactly I feel, I feel a oblivion surrounding me!!

  

The Search

A Sleep

A Dream

A wake up call
That's all it takes.

I found so many things
With that my search starts
...for more than i dream of
This marks the beginning.

And yet
the tinge of doubt entangles me
...into it's treacherous web;
My path thus wavers
Not one
Not two
But too many choices to choose from.

Will I get what I want?
How will I get it?
Where will I get it?
WHEN will I get it?


WHAT is it that i want??

....and the search continues....

Happy 50th

It is strange that I stopped writing just when my blog was to celebrate its 50th post! I did not deliberately stop it though...I've just been a bit busy AND not to forget lazy...

Anyway now that I am here I thought I'd do something new...Acrostics

Happy I am
As much as a kid is when given a sweet
Placing my thoughts
Perfect in order
Young-Old...
50th post it is...

I don't know how much sense it makes to the reader, but I had to start...
kind of silly...meaningless...to some minds...
but this means a lot to me...
I never thought that I'd ever write a poem, article, story or do ANYTHING to do with writing!
Yet here I am...

I salute to all bloggers...for their comments....that motivated me to write, write more and write well...(at least better than what crap I used to write...)

This is one of the wishes I have wished for...and that is fulfilled...:))

A Prayer To Thee

May all that you have stored for me
Be the Best and Divine as Thee
May all that I hope for
I wish for
come true for sure.


May Thee shower 
His choicest blessings upon me.
I pray to Thee.


What is life without Hard Times;
What is life without knowing what is wrong;
What is life doing everything right;
What is life if the Paradise is lost?


May I get what is perfect for me
May all that Thee hath stored for me 
Be what I always wanted to be.


Thou shall save me from the devil
If he ever intend to bring damnation upon me.


Wind
Water
Earth 
Fire
May all bless me with strength to
Protect and generate life in
Every possible form.

May I inherit 

Happiness from the 'new' mother's heart;

Smile from the new born's lips;

Pride from the new father's arms.

And 

Love from the Supreme.

For I am a daughter 

That you crafted 

to give happiness to my mum and dad.

May the Stars shine upon me.

And the Moon smile towards me.

May Thee lead me to my treasure

As my heart shall be there, too.

[P.S. : This is purely accidental, don't take it as 'coming from my heart' kind of thing. For I surely haven't done anything, YET, to make my parents proud/happy of me.] :((

May Thee hath the

Best in store for me....

Something Special?

It is past my curfew, and still I stand here looking up towards the sky, it is one of those most beautiful nights ever. Stars shining like diamonds on a velvet carpet, moon looking at me as though...
I look down, the city is still buzzing. Strange that people don't realize the beauty around them, In'it? But still some nights are special for some and other nights for others...


I find it really strange when people can pin point their 'special' moments. I donno, I somehow cannot. One can say its a memory problem, BUT I remember THINGS that are special to me. What is it exactly that you define special as? I am sure we can not 'exactly' tell the meaning of special, it is something like love...it means different to everyone. Seriously. NO ONE has the same perception or view towards love. Similarly, Special cannot be defined by just a word or sentence! Just Google it! I assure you, you'll find many meanings to this very 'special' word. Surpassing what is common or usual; something that is exceptional; something out of this world yet present in front of your eyes!


Everything that I have is special to me. As a matter of fact given a chance everything around us is special in some way or another. We see miracles happening everyday, but don't wanna accept them! WHY? Because we are too intelligent for such a 'special' thing? 


The message that I want to send across is that why not give a chance? Might it be a beggar, or a failed student, OR yourself! Everything is SPECIAL we just don't reach out for it! 


The Question remains WHY NOT?


We hear people say 'get a life', probably this is what it means give it a TRY! MAKE it special!






GIVE IT A CHANCE! :))

Confessions of a Sister

Dedicated to my one and only sister. Elder to me (whom many on first sight take to be the younger one).

• I love you.
• I hate you.
• You are the best critic I could ever have.
• I am jealous when people say you seem to be the younger one.
• I never want to be like you.
• I admire your guts.
• I love to steal your belongings.
• I wish I was as pretty as you.
• I miss you.
• I wish I was as intelligent as you.
• I've been imagining your wedding day ever since Shivangi's sister got married.
• I keep doubting if you love me above all...except mum and dad.
• I don't like it when you keep talking on phone and not with me.
• I know no one has ever loved me as much as you have.
• You are the best sister I could ever have had.
• I've never felt the need of a brother with you in my life.

I can not remember all right now, I'll keep updating this. I can assure you there are many more confessions to make...jokes apart.

Love

Guilty...

Mrinal

Life as I wish

Some to love
Some who love

Some to play with
Some to have the real fun with

Some to cuddle
Some to fight

Some peace
Some restlessness

Some to excite
Some  to sooth

Someone to give an honest opinion
Someone to bitch with
Someone to bitch about

Some blessings

Some sense of worth

A 'Father', 'Mother'
AND

A 'Sister'

Not to forget a bunch of reliable 'Friends'

My wish as life...

'Am I asking for much?

OOPS
'M not asking for it

I HAVE IT!!

The Superior Scribbler Award

1. Each superior scribbler must in turn pass The Award on to 5 most deserving blogger friends.
2. Each superior scribbler must link to the author and the name of the blog from whom he/she has received The Award.
3. Each superior scribbler must display The Award on his/her blog, and link to this post which explains The Award.
4. Each blogger who wins The Superior Scribbler Award must visit this post and add his/her name to My Linky List.
5. Each Superior Scribbler must post these rules on his/her blog.


An Award with a 'superior' attached to it...*honorable*


But 'm gonna disappoint the reader that m not following any of the rules at the moment, reason: my net sucks at the moment PLUS I've been off the blogging area for over a week...I'll start my "major" articles from this monday...well at least try to start...as my sister is home after two months and then there is some renovation work starting at my place...BUT I'll definitely TRY.


ThankYou Shravan for the award...=)

TAGGED!!!

Tagged by Roshwrites! 

Rules of the the award.

- List five current obsessions.

- Pass the award to five more fabulous blogs.

- On your post of receiving this award, make sure you include the person who gave you this award and link it back to them.

- When you post your five winners make sure you link them as well.

- Don't forget your winners to know they won an award from you!

 My current obsessions:

- Greek and Roman plays

- Thomas Andrew Felton

- Momos (Veg.)

- Listening radio

- Watching movies!

Five Fabulous Blogs I Award this Award to:

- Ayesha

- Sparshita

- Pulkit

- Apurva

- Smita

P.S. : Thank you SO much Rosh! :)

I Want To Live Again

I feel the fresh air
I feel the wind whispering through my hair
I feel like the morning dew
I feel new

I feel I am born again
I want to live again

No clue where my heart is
No clue where I am
No limitations
No restrictions

I feel I am born again
I want to live again

I feel like running through fields
I feel like climbing top of the hills
I feel like flying with the raven in the sky
I feel like dancing with the moon
I feel like exploring the unexplored
I feel like going beyond the world

I feel I am born again
I want to live again.

I want to find light in the dark
I want to reach out and hold the sun

I want to flow with the river
I want to fall with the waterfall
I want to rise with the wave

I want to zoom like a canon ball
I want to sprint like a leopard

I feel new

I feel I am born again

I want to live again!

Random Things About Me (Part 2)

Here I am again telling, rather blabbering about myself without knowing if anyone is even interested in knowing it. I guess I am doing this for two major reasons:
1. I am trying to understand myself.
2. I want my tini-mini blog to be active untill I get enough time to write the long posts I once used to.

So without any further explanantions lets start with 'myself' :

32. I don't like talking on phone long.
33. I love melodramatic movies.
34. I wonder how someone came love only and only one person at a time. Well as in you know 'boyfriend' kind of love.(Many contradictions coming to this for sure.)
35. I have a major ego problem.
36. I can be irritating without even caring about it.
37. I am desperate and excited for my sister's wedding day. (Strange!? I know, girls are usually desperate and excited about their own wedding, but seriously I can't imagine myself getting married.)
38. I don't like orange candies.
39. I believe I am evil. NOT cruel but evil. =D
40. I am selfish for strangers.
41. I love cotton sarees.
42. I don't believe in the mythical-religious stories. But I do believe in a divine power. Though I must confess I love reading, watching and hearing all these stories such as Ramayana.
43. I want to fall in love with a complete stranger.
44. I don't really know what is my kind of guy but from my past experiences I've realized my kind of guy would be a lean, rich, B.A.D.(it is in capitals because I want to emphasize on this one ), dumb, respectful of elders,  flamboyant, and ready to accept me as I am - without any changes.
45. I love momos.(That is why I eat them up.)=D
46. I don't make friends easily.
47. I might seem shy, innocent, quite, and lovey-dovey to strangers.
48. I get angry really fast.
49. I believe in 'magic'.
50. I don't really hate anyone.
51. Once I get to know someone I stick to them.
52. I don't like tragedies. And my entire course of this year is full of tragedies...trauma!!
53. I adore my best buddies. (I know it is obvious but I just wanted to mention it.)
54. I can like anything! Beleive me! if I can like 'Laga Chunri Mein Daag'- the movie, I can like anything. So say my friends. :)
55. My grammar is BAD!!!
56. I am bad with spellings as well. (Cool now everyone is wondering 'What is this idiot doing in a course like English hons.?')
57. I have a 'twin'. Not the biological one but mentally and philosophically alike twin. ANCHAL. I hope you read this Anchal.
58. Even though Sanjukta (one of my best friend) hardly likes anything in me she IS my best friend.Strange but true.
60. I lost a best friend lately. Well it was coming for a long time but I accepted it recently.(I had 5 best friends before this.)
61. I don't like when people say 'Bye'.
62. I never turn around to see if the person is still standing where I lift them or have they left.
63. I love taking long walks.
64. I prefer face-to-face conversations.
65. I don't like candle-light dinners. The idea just seems too obvious to me. I prefer thunders...and beaches...or mountainhills for 'romance'. But I am not much of a romantic.


Ummm....that's it for today. I hope I did not repeat anything, I don't want to go check it, because my silly super slow computer is frustrating me now. And I want to make one of my past statements clear: when I said 'I don't like Harry Potter' I meant I did not like Harry Potter the character, because I love the series. Its my all time favorite! My school friends and I even called ourselves 'Potter Freaks or Potterish'. And about the character, I am not outrightly saying that I don't like it I am trying to say that I don't like it as much as he is hyped about. I'd prefer Ron over Harry any day! I guess I've made my point clear.

That's it for the time being. :)